In future, do not allow Thing Two to sit near me in the stands when Thing One's basketball team is playing.
Although they did end up winning the game, and they are a very good team in general, today everything seemed off for some reason--their passes weren't tight, their shots weren't dropping, and, in particular, they couldn't find a rebound with both hands and a flashlight. Pure grit and a few key shots got them through, and we were proud that they had the mental toughness to pull it off, to be sure. I was trying really, really hard to only make positive comments to the team and to keep whatever other mumbling I might have been doing under my breath entirely to myself.
However, deep in the third period, a small voice in front of me piped up, "For the love of Christ, will you REBOUND???" (fortunately, not loudly enough to be heard on-court, and quickly shushed), and I realized that my resident little pitcher was able to hear my muttered commentary from his seat in front of me. Bad mother moment number I don't even know what!