Found out today that Thing One asked a girl to the upcoming dance last week and she turned him down. (Note to all relatives reading this: he does NOT know that I know, so SHHHH. Really.)
Having two opposing reactions more or less simultaneously (hence the title.)
1) As the mom of two boys, I want the girls to recognize the courage it takes for a boy to ask them out. A response of "yes" would be nice unless there's reason to say "no."
2) As the mom of a daughter, I don't want any girl to feel like she has to say "yes" when she'd rather not. In any situation ever.
I heard about this from a friend with a daughter in the same grade. The daughter, who is a good friend of Thing One's, was furious with the other girl for turning him down. (Not to her face, just privately.)
I admit to having a moment of thinking "my son's a good kid; what the hell is wrong with you, girl?" What it boils down to, though, is that there's nothing wrong with this girl at all. She's a lovely young woman, in fact, and her right to say "no" should win every time, no matter how much I love my son. I just hope for his sake that she did it gently. Damn, this parenting stuff is hard. :(