Oh Deer

I looked out the window this evening and counted 16 #%!#$ deer in my yard. 16.

Growing up mostly as a city kid, I was new to the whole deer thing when we moved here. I actually thought it was pretty cool to be able to see them right in my own yard. People from around here thought I was completely insane. Now I understand why.

They are a threat to the livelihood of the farmers, whose crops they decimate because of their large numbers. They cut a swath through backyard vegetation too. I finally gave up and pulled out all my hostas and lilies, tulips and crocuses, because applying even the foulest of rotten egg sprays didn't keep the deer from eating them down to the nubs. Tulips are my favorite flower, so that about killed me.

Then, they are a threat on the roads. Himself ran off the road to avoid hitting one shortly after we moved here, and we were so lucky that he wasn't hurt. If it ever happens to me, I am aiming directly at that sucker...hitting one would probably cause less damage to my car than the post-swerve offroading did to my husband's car.

But the final insult was when Thing One contracted Lyme Disease from a deer tick in our own yard. Fortunately he got the rash, and I saw it, and got him the antibiotics ASAP. He's fine now.

But this is now WAR. Gimme a shotgun and get out of my way! Anybody want some venison? It will be fresh...